A post of casual-minded utterances...

I am a bit disappointed for I hoped I would write something big, of more value today. Yet, beyond my means of changing fate, I coped - but should - with no such thing... Too late! Away, afar, astray and an Antelope... these are just some of the words that begin with and "A" and also describe how I feel about life or my fate or the state of my mind today. Oh, fiddlesticks, never mind - the antelope was just uncalled for, wasn't it? For it doesn't fit the context in any way, shape or form... In scorn, the wants-to-be-poetical-figure now laughs at himself, for his mindless rant just quite doesn't cut it. Well stop it! Just stop it, like that? Like that, please do, and start anew...

I've received a bit too much praise lately.
Some justified, some unintentional, some just uncalled for.
Well, at the very least, we ripped the theatre apart with our overwhelming talent, didn't we?
No, actually not, the others were just way more horrible.

I hoped this post would actually describe an academic person's view on my essay. Sad thing is - our discussion wasn't that interesting, so there's nothing much to tell. I think I made to comma mistakes somewhere. I will see to those. Some repetition was marked with red, yet later found not unsuitable at all. Main thing is - one shouldn't give the audience a fright, or rather - one shouldn't talk about necrophilia in the second sentence, when writing an admission essay. Likable and lovable, however, is the fact, that the stress was on "the second sentence". Which then again means that - as long as do not fail to I support all my bold and cynical statements - I am good to go!

Linguistics is fun, isn't it?

Here, have a bite!
*bites*

I will try to take some time over the weekend and continue Johnstown.

An Essay

Even though the Age of Exploration is long past and even though there are probably no melodies we have not heard by now, there are still plenty of stirring ideas left untouched to this day. For example, it can be said that most people would never consider implementing concepts like death, sacrilege or necrophilia into any context, regardless of their various possible implications. However, I believe that every concept and every idea bears beauty within and that this beauty can be uncovered and harvested to inspire revelry and delight much like cherry blossom does. Because I am obsessed with beauty I can broaden my horizon without restraints and never will I deem a manner of thought unwieldy for everything is yet another source of inspiration for me.

It is a rather frequent occurrence that an idea or product that lacks marketability on its own can still be subject to great renown by the way it is presented. In 2009 a teacher of mine had me compete in a speech contest for high school students, while also offering help with editing and cleansing my drafts of unsuitable content. That time my efforts did not bear fruit, however, and the nice little speech I had prepared failed to impress the jury and the audience. That setback led me to discovering the true potential of individuality and the importance of knowing where the lines are drawn. If one knows which lines should never be crossed then that someone also knows how fascinating it is for others to observe how one can walk the line and step on it in the process. The following year I entered the contest again and I had a great time bending and playing around with one of the given topics. That time I delivered a unique and charismatic performance that won me the first place.

Beauty is generally considered to be a vague and broad concept and I do not disagree. After all, it is highly dependent on personal preference and taste. That is why I am so extraordinarily interested in discovering what people cherish most and even more in what they do not cherish at all. I like broadening the ways by which beauty is perceived and looked upon. I like decorating myself by wearing trendy scarfs or glasses, even though my eyesight is just fine, and people notice my efforts. Even though vast amounts of decisions and conclusions should be and are expected to be made by logic and reason only, there is still much room left for subconscious influence and emotions. Learning of other people’s interest has thus provided me with what I consider to be invaluable knowledge and acceptance towards all ideas and their potential power.

The market and the media are separate worlds on their own much like the world that was explored thoroughly by the 17^th century but still has secrets. I believe that there is many a wondrous and valuable sentiment hidden in those worlds and that I possess the courage to seek those out difficulties notwithstanding. I feel commitment towards my ideals and I strive for their realisation in a day by day basis. For I believe in the beauty of new ideas – exploration is my motivation.

Johnstown Castle - part 13

“...I find myself unworthy of thy sight...”

Rain had begun its humble whispering outside while we, still fixed, in wait of something, gazed at one another. Would she speak, I didn’t know and she didn’t seem to want to. Someway in a state of drowse I helped myself to blunting the awkwardness of the situation and felt at ease.
“Today...” Loretta spoke quietly as if she wanted to meld her voice into the soft sound of rain. The shy mimosa, if you touch its leaves...
“Today, what you... and I”
So she reminded me of the vibrant and flickering lights, the dusty air and the golden sun, which had arisen from the grey morn and disappeared in a sea of red in the evening. But Loretta just kept on looking and so my mind couldn’t help but wander. I thought that if I had died right there on the spot, never to see another day again, that day would have been the most luminous day of my life. Why, I didn’t know. If I had died right then and there all would have been perfect. I knew it, even though I didn’t understand everything - so much had happened. But, no, I didn’t want to die. I was interested. I wanted to know and see more of everything.
Loretta had taken hold of my hand without me noticing it, my mind was so astray. Her eyes demanded an answer and god knows I ought to have given her one. Yet I did not, for I simply didn’t want to close what was open. I needed time to think and I actually wished she hadn’t come. Not then at least, but another day maybe. She deserved better, didn’t she? Where had all my sympathy gone?
“Good night, Loretta.”
I closed my eyes and relaxed. Even though sleep didn’t come to me, my eyes were relieved and my mind as well. I would deal with everything in due time, she understood that. We’d talk about everything tomorrow, wouldn’t we? Perhaps we wouldn’t after all? Loretta didn’t leave right away, which was comforting, but stayed for a while and left quietly a little later. The door closed behind her thus sealing the day, putting, as far as I was concerned, an end to a story with a conclusion.
I was wrong, however, for the day was far from over. Perhaps I shouldn’t have opened my eyes again?

To be continued...